Will of chaos

Pov Vecna:

For me, as for others, the conquest of our universe has always been secondary, something that had to be done to acquire sufficient resources and sufficient labor.

People’s freedom, their contentment, and other things didn’t matter. If we talked, everyone would die anyway. There was no point in thinking about everyone’s lives beyond the bare minimum to avoid inconvenience.

“(What a compassionate person~… sacrificing so much for the universe~…)” (????)

“(You can mock all you want, but thanks to that, we had all the resources of our universe at our disposal. All the other scientists and scholars were serving as research assistants, whether they knew it or not.)” (me)

“(In ten years, our technology advanced centuries beyond what it should have been. We discovered new energy sources, developed new analytical tools, and further developed medical technology, as the last years before universal collapse would be followed by large-scale natural disturbances, radiation of various kinds, and possibly widespread epidemics.)” (me)

“(That’s why we had to improve medicine as a secondary matter. We left that part of research to others and used their discoveries to further refine it for our own use.)” (me)

“(After ten years, Hajak had already compiled all the knowledge of our universe, and thanks to interacting with so many people, he was able to have a more active discourse, facilitating conversation.)” (me)

“(You speak very well of the 10 years of tyranny where entire cities were purged, where civil wars were quickly ended with mass genocide, and hundreds of people were kidnapped daily for experimentation.)” (????)

I still didn’t know who this Entity was, but it knows a lot. It altered memories so I could see cities being eradicated, armies of machines bathing the ground in rebel blood, and people being forcibly taken to experimentation zones.

I knew all of this; these were actions taken on our orders, but I’m sure I never saw any images of these things. I didn’t have time to waste on this nonsense, so there’s no way these images could be in my memory. They can only be memories this Entity possesses, which means it’s been watching us since before Ascension.

“(Your questions will be answered, whether you want them or not~.)” (????)

“(What exactly do you want?)” (me)

“(It seems you don’t care about everything you did back then~… so much suffering~…)” (????)

“(Do you want me to regret what I did? Do you want to see me mourn people who would have died anyway?)” (me)

“(It seems you still don’t understand, so let’s continue~.)” (????)

Snap

This time a finger-snap sounded, and the memory jumped to something else. The three of us were in a room with holograms scattered everywhere, displaying rudimentary information about natural energies.

“(Do you remember that day…?)” (????)

“(Yes, that’s when we gathered all the data from 10 years of research.)” (me)

Snap

With a snap of the fingers, the memory began to move at normal speed, and their voices could be heard.

“This confirms the theory of natural energies.” (me)

“This would never have been noticed even after 1,000 years; the values are tiny.” (Mavor)

“How to store and utilize these energies is also a mystery; it seems impossible to do so by normal means.” (Urak)

“Look at these readings; there seems to be a pattern. Specific places, like volcanoes, have more fire energy, and mountains have more earth energy.” (me)

“The same goes for the ocean having more water energy and metal mines having metallic energy. It was through these locations that we were able to perceive these energies and name them as such.” (me)

“With this data, we were able to analyze these energies in greater or lesser concentrations throughout the universe. It seems they have greater concentrations in specific areas, but areas without these elements would have nothing.” (Urak)

“These energies are all unique, beyond our understanding, but they affect entire environments. How can we…” (Urak)

“Look at this data. They were also found in the collapse zones, but their readings are different, altered, conflicting, and sucked inward.” (Mavor)

“I think we found a good option. We need these energies. If we stabilize them, we can at least stop the collapse and at most, we can return the universe to its previous state.” (me)

“Vecna, as much as I agree that this is a possible path, look at this… Hajak, show him the results.” (Mavor)

“[As you wish, Doctor Mavor.]” (Hajak)

“[After 12,983,203,900 simulations, I have confirmed with 99.2% certainty that no material in my database could contain or influence these energies.]” (Hajak)

Snap

Suddenly the memory stopped. I felt my mental body once more. I looked at my hand, and then where I appeared, I was in the room facing the holographic screen where Hajak was showing the results of his simulations. My ‘me’ from that time was beside me, also paralyzed, staring at the holographic screen.

“(It was at that moment that you decided, wasn’t it~?)” (????)

“(You decided to be more than human, because of just a few words in a random corner of this screen, a few words your colleagues ignored…)” (????)

“(…)” (me)

She sometimes seemed to whisper in one ear and then suddenly switch to the other. Her hands seemed multiple and yet one, teleporting around my body, always in my blind spots. It was unnerving to be at her mercy like that.

Even so, her words weren’t wrong. It was at that moment that I took my third step toward who I am today. In the corner of the screen, it simply said ‘living organic matter: 0.8% (undetermined)’. They were words that awakened a dream in me, a possibility of being more.

“(Hajak was always too detailed in his terminology and explanations.)” (me)

“(For there to be something Hajak considered undetermined was surreal; it would be the second time since the discovery of these natural energies.)” (me)

“(I’m not talking about your aspirations, I’m talking about this~~?)” (????)

Snap

She snaps her fingers again, and the memory shifts. This time she was in an experimentation room. If I’m not mistaken, it was experimentation room A337.

This was the first human experimentation room we acquired, and it was 100 square meters in size. There were naked men and women strapped to surgical tables, chambers filled with liquid solutions, and chained inside gas cylinders.

All of them had faces distorted in agony, some of them had their skin burned by radiation, some of them had tumors on their bodies due to the chemicals they inhaled, and others had marks on their bodies spreading as they writhed.

Urak and I were in the room, discussing the results of the experiments while ignoring the groans of pain from around us. Mavor, on the other hand, was creating new technologies using parts of bodies kept artificially alive.

“(You don’t care about these people at all, do you?)” (????)

“(I’m not cruel, I didn’t do this for pleasure, and I didn’t do it out of anger. I needed to test the interaction of those energies with living bodies. I didn’t have time to test on other animals; testing directly on humans yielded faster results.)” (me)

“(The two years in a row were full of innovation. We had discovered ways to use magic and Ki—those weren’t the names we used for them, but it doesn’t matter.)” (me)

“(Our technology advanced even further, but it was still useless. It wasn’t possible to stop the collapse that was already spreading.)” (me)

“(That’s when Project Ascendant began.)” (me)

“(It was necessary to modify the bodies. We needed an energy core, a heart for that energy to pulse. We needed to change the structure of our veins, and we also needed tattoos on our backs to expel excess energy.)” (me)

At that time, I realized I could evolve into something greater. That energy affected the environment, and if we had control over such power, then we would be invincible Gods.

“(We couldn’t test it on ourselves, so we tested it on others in large numbers. In two years, we had a great number of good and bad results.)” (me)

“(We’re getting close to the end~…)” (????)

Suddenly, the scene was once again filled with darkness. I was alone once more, but this time I felt like she was beside me, playing with me as if I were some kind of toy for her amusement.

But worst of all, something inside me was tightening. I felt like there was something missing, something important that I couldn’t find in my memories.

When I realized this, I finally understood something. I understood the reason for all this, why she was making me go through all these memories. She doesn’t care about what I had to do in the past. Her words were just jokes to confuse me. She doesn’t care about me either. From the first moment she appeared, I was already in her hand, and yet she deceived me.

“(You’re messing with my memory.)” (me)

“(You finally realized, Mr. Genius~~…)” (????)

“(But that’s not all. What could have been hiding beyond this darkness…?)” (????)

The mist around me disappears as the darkness seems to lift in certain spots. A couple reveals themselves in one of these spots. Their faces were invisible, but their bodies looked very familiar.

In another spot, a woman grasped the hand. A wedding bracelet could be seen on her wrist, as well as a smile on her face, which was still shrouded in darkness.

At the last point that became visible was a single newborn, crying, stretching its arms upward as if trying to reach something. I feel like I should know who they all are, and I can even guess their identities, but I can’t remember anything.

“(All your memories and decisions in your memory were about you, but do you know who they are~?)” (????)

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