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Alan and Sean walked downstairs and out of Kim's house. They had their bicycles locked to poles and began to unlock them.
Sean was shaking his head in wonder the whole time. He got his bicycle ready to go, then swung a leg over it. But then he paused and said, "Alan, dude, one question before we go."
"What?" By that time Alan was also on his bicycle and ready to leave.
"How do you do it, man? ... I mean, all the sex. All the women. You were nearly as nerdy as I was a couple of months ago, and now look at you! You have your own fan club! The friggin' "Service Alan Club," no less. If I read something like that in some pornography story I would just laugh at it being too over-the-top. I mean, what the HELL?! I've seen it with my own eyes, and I still can't really believe it!"
Alan thought back to how things began: the wildly improbable medical verdict by Dr. Fredrickson, the unusually friendly nursing by Akami Fubuki, Suzanne's eagerness to help him reach his daily target, and so on. Step by step he had fallen into a life of sex, but the whole story was so bizarre that he knew recounting it would just freak Sean out even more. So he merely said, "It's like this. Some people are lucky. I've been wildly lucky. To win the lottery would be a come down from all the luck I've had lately. But it's also what you do with your opportunities that counts. I don't mean to brag, but I think I've handled my wild ride pretty well so far. That's what I'm trying to teach you: how to handle sex, love, and women."
He paused and put his feet back on the ground, as he realized they'd be there a while. "Here's the thing. It's occurred to me that most men are bad lovers. They're horrible at sex. Sure, they teach sex ed in school, but they don't actually teach you how to fuck well. I don't think it's so much that I'm really good, although I guess I'm lucky with some physical traits like stamina, it's that I seem great in comparison to all the other guys."
He went on, "The thing is, most guys are just looking out for their own pleasure and don't care how much their girl enjoys it. And the guys who ARE good in bed let that go to their head and are usually arrogant assholes. Love 'em and leave 'em. I don't do that. I almost always get emotionally involved with the girl I have sex with. For instance, Joy and Janice are the two girls I probably know the least and have been with the least, but I even feel emotionally for them."
He thought in particular about Janice's unrequited love for Joy. "And with an emotional attachment and true caring, the sex is soooo much better. Otherwise, you might as well be with a whore. Now I'm giving you the keys to the kingdom. You're a lot like me. You can benefit from all I've learned and have a harem of your own."
Sean's eyes went wide at that. "You may find this hard to believe, dude, but I don't WANT a harem! Yes, I'll admit, the orgy just now was fantastic. No matter what happens, that experience is going to be burned into my brain for the rest of my life. But I'm in LOVE! I know you'll think I'm crazy, maybe you tried to shock me with Heather today to shock me out of love, but it didn't work. I see that some of the things you've been saying about Heather are true, but I still love her anyways."
"Some?! Sean, ALL! From what you've seen today and what I've told you before, you still don't know the half of it. Would you like me to tell you some stories about what she's done?"
"NO! Sorry, uh, I mean, no. Really, I can only take so much today and my brain is about to burst. I mean it's literally gonna explode like what happened to that guy's stomach in 'Alien'. There's too much to take! I'll concede that everything you say has been true so far and you're probably completely right about Heather, but give me time to adjust, for fuck's sake! Not only that, but why are you so keen on turning me off to her? Is it because you want her to yourself?"
Suddenly Sean began to get angry, as he thought about his last statement. "Is this what this is all about, you're trying to remove me as competition, so you confuse me with orgies and say all these bad things about Heather? Well, it isn't going to work!"
"Hold on! Dude! First off, I'm not going to sugar-coat this: you're no competitive threat when it comes to Heather. Until I started teaching you the ways of sex, you were just one more guy with a serious crush on her, one more guy looking all dreamy-eyed at her when she was walking down the halls. She didn't even know or care that you existed, and she still doesn't. You would never have had a snowball's chance in hell with her, and you know it. Only since I've started training you do you begin to have a ghost of a chance. I'm not trying to steal Heather from you, in fact, it's the complete opposite! I'm trying to throw her into your arms and get you up to snuff so you can have something lasting with her. But this is the kind of thanks I get?"
Sean was feeling a little bit abashed, but not fully so. "But the orgy... You let me get carried away with lust. I cheated on her."
"Listen, Sean. I'm not mad at you for doubting me, because the truth I'm trying to tell you is so wildly improbable. The fact is, I have half a dozen women right now whom I'm sleeping with regularly, whom I love deeply, and who are more attractive than Heather and a million times easier to be with than Heather. Why the hell do I need Heather?"
Sean folded his arms and looked very skeptical. He didn't actually say "Who could be more attractive than Heather?" but it was obvious he was thinking it.
Alan said, "I can see you're still doubting, so I'll tell you who one of them is. You know Amy's my official girlfriend. You might consider Heather better looking than Amy, but I don't. I'm also very intimate with Amy's mother Suzanne."
"You're with Amy's mother?! HOLY fucking... Jesus H. fucking Christ! Mrs. Pestridge?! I'll concede that if there's a woman in this world technically sexier than Heather, it would have to be her. When she comes to any school event, it's like an awed hush falls over the whole place. But she's Amy's mother! You're doing both mother and daughter at the same time?"
Alan smiled. "Not often enough."
"What?! You mean you have them in bed at the same time even? My God! If my dick wasn't totally destroyed at the moment, I would be knocking this bike over with my hard-on. Christ!" Sean paused, then tentatively brought up a fond memory, uncertain how Alan would react. "Hey man, do you remember last year, how Mrs. Pestridge dressed at one of those parent-teacher conferences?"
Alan grinned as images of that night came back to him. "Do I remember? How could I forget? I assume you're talking about that business suit that showed off all her cleavage."
"That's the one. Damn! You'd have to have gotten a yardstick to measure all the ivory skin in sight that night, 'cos a ruler just wouldn't have cut it. And those dark ruby-red lips and green eyes! And the way she walked, showing off so much leg! It's almost like she fucks, rather than walks, her way across a room."
Alan laughed at that very apt description. "Pretty close!" He thought, Now that I know Mother better, I'll bet she must have had someone she was trying to seduce that evening because she rarely goes out in public quite that scandalously dressed. No doubt the lucky schmuck succumbed to her charms, whether he was married or not. I'm gonna make a mental note to get her to wear that suit again sometime.
Smiling as he reveled in the fact that this incredible woman was all his now, he commented, "Every guy who saw her had to immediately sit down and cover their laps, if you know what I mean."
"I do." Sean grinned and laughed like a naughty schoolboy, which wasn't very far off the truth. "The drag is, now I can't fantasize about her anymore... Hey, don't you call her Aunt Suzy sometimes? She's practically your second mother."
Suddenly Alan doubted the wisdom of telling Sean about Suzanne, but it was too late to back out now. "Yeah, we've been really close. I shouldn't be telling you about her and me, but I'm putting my trust in you. Not only because you're my best friend these days, but also because you're vital to my plan."
"I am? Plan? What plan?"
Alan was relieved that Sean was going along with the change of topic. "My plan to get Heather out of my life. Turn her over to you. You saw the sex she and I had today, and it was great, but I have even better sex with the likes of Amy, Amy's mom, and others that I unfortunately can't mention by name since I want to respect their privacy. Incredible sex. Sex where you see stars, and that's not just a saying - it really happens. Sex where you're literally one with the universe. I tell you, the more I learn, the more I begin to think there's just no end to the amount of pleasure people can have having sex. I can't even begin to explain. Have you ever heard of a whole-body orgasm, for instance?"
"A what?"
"Remember that phrase and look it up on the Internet tonight. That'll give you a sense of what I'm talking about. I have a whole bevy of women whom I love deeply and I can't spend enough time with. If I never saw Heather again, I'd be a happy guy, because it would mean I could spend more time with the likes of Amy and her mother. Well, that's not entirely true - I do have a certain fondness for the blonde bitch, if only because she's such a character - but on balance my life would be a lot easier without her. But Heather's got her claws in me and I can't just walk away or all hell will break loose. You have no idea how powerful she is at school or how vengeful she can be. I just want peace and happiness; I don't want to deal with her endless psycho-dramas."
Sean said, "I don't know about all that, but DAMN! I think she's just about the hottest girl on the entire planet! I could put up with some drama if I could grope her, her... well, you get the idea." He turned bashful, as he wasn't used to talking frankly about sex with Alan or anyone else for that matter.
"Good," Alan replied. "You need to step in, if you think you can handle it. It's like that scene in 'Raiders of the Lost Ark' where Harrison Ford is in that jungle cave where the big boulder rolls behind him. Remember just before that, when he steals that golden idol statue and he replaces it with another object of the same size and weight to prevent all hell from breaking loose? That's exactly what I'm trying to do here. You'll take my place in Heather's life."
"But all hell DID break loose," Sean pointed out. "The replacement wasn't exactly the same, so all the traps were sprung, like that big boulder getting released. Hell DID break loose! He nearly got flattened!"
"Hmmm. Good point. This is going to be a risky operation, true. That's why you have to be trained and ready. You're not ready for Heather yet. I've put you on the fast track because each day I seem to get deeper into Heather's grasp. You should have seen what happened before school this morning for instance, but that's a story for another time. But that's why I'm pretty much trying to turn the S-Club over to you."
"What? That does not compute. Putting me with other women will just draw my affections and energy away from Heather, won't it? I mean, I'm not in love with them, but I have to admit Kim, Janice and Joy are pretty cool. Still, what happened today has to be the last time for me with any of those three. I don't care how big a slut Heather is; I have to be true to her in order to respect myself." He seemed pained to admit Heather was a slut.
"Sean, Sean, Sean. You have so much to learn about the girl you say you love. Not only do you still need more sexual practice with the likes of those three before you can have any hopes with Heather, but you NEED a harem of your own. Heather isn't going to respect anyone without at least, say, six sex slaves."
Sean's heart skipped a beat and he stood slack-jawed. "Did you just say 'sex slaves'?"
"I did. Perhaps I got carried away there. Let's say fuck partners. You see, Heather's not into loyalty or monogamy. She might say otherwise, but I know what she really wants. She'll fuck anyone she wants to fuck, male or female. She won't respect anyone who pledges undying loyalty and devotion to her."
"Huh? Why not?"
"Well, she thinks loyal is boring. Complete devotion is for suckers. Anyone loyal can be taken for granted and basically tossed aside. She wants challenge and competition. She wants a sexual superstar who's fucking as many, or better yet, more people than she is. That's like a calling card that shows the person is worthy of her attention. The more she has to fight her way to the top of the heap, the more she loves it. Plus, she's got me as her standard now, and she knows roughly how many women I'm with. My replacement has got to be similarly impressive. Of course, I'm talking about the Heather of today. We're going to try to change that. Remember, first you have to be attractive to the bitchy Heather, and only then can you start to change her and bring out the angel hidden inside that we both briefly glimpsed today."
"But Alan! Dude! What you're suggesting here is soooo not going to happen. For one thing, I know I'm looking a gift horse in the mouth, but maybe I don't want a harem. Call me weird. Sure, I'd love the sex, but at what price? I have to admit, I have kind of a dark side. When I was fucking three girls at once just now, I felt like a big shot. I loved it, living like a lord. When you tell me you're fucking a mother and daughter at the same time, I'm like, 'Yeah! Do them both!' I get off on the sinfulness of it all. I'm so twisted that I even get thoughts of ordering them to kiss each other. I'm sorry. I'm not thinking about those two in general; I don't even let myself think about Amy in any sexual way since she's your girlfriend. I'm just talking about the 'mother and daughter together in bed' kind of thing."
Alan thought, Hmmm. Maybe I might be able to tell him about all the incest stuff some day, if he has that kind of attitude. Maybe he's even more twisted than I am. But he's certainly got to pass a lot more loyalty and trustworthiness tests before I'd entrust him with that deep secret, even if he's totally okay with the general idea.
Sean was continuing, "Then, when you said 'sex slaves' just now, well, you don't want to know what that does to me. You seem to have not let it all go to your head, but I'd probably go power mad at the first opportunity. That's why I need to be a one girl kind of guy. When I think of what I might be capable of with all kinds of women at my beck and call, well, I don't want to open that Pandora's Box."
"Sean, I appreciate your honesty, and believe me, I'm grappling with the power issue every day. Sometimes I feel like I'm on the verge of losing it completely. That's one reason why I like talking to you, because finally there's another guy starting to understand what I'm going through. I'm hoping that we can help each other, keep an eye on each other to fight the whole power-mad thing. But in your case, having a harem is the only way to make headway with Heather."
He went on, "I'll be completely and brutally frank. You don't stand a chance of having her take you seriously as a long-term prospect unless you show her you're an amazing sex stud keeping many other girls well fucked. Competition is such a big motivator for her; you HAVE to use that as a lever or she'll ride all over you. Either go all out, or give up on her right now. There's no point in doing something in between because that's guaranteed to fail. I understand her mindset some. If you follow the path I've set for you, I think you really can win her heart in the long run, at least as much as anyone can."
"But dude! I'm no sex stud. I'm a nerd who happens to have muscles from playing sports. I was a complete virgin until this last week! There is no fucking way I will come CLOSE to your sexual skill. Ever. No way!"
"Don't be so sure," Alan said. "Ask Janice, or Joy, or Kim. I'm sure they weren't caring who was attached to whose dick when things were hot and heavy on the 'fuck train' up there." He nodded upward towards Kim's bedroom. "It was all equally good. True, I didn't really give that session my all, but you're just as handsome as me, just as athletic as me, and just as smart as me. Smarter, in fact. If I can learn things like how to give a whole-body orgasm, you can too."
"That's not true," Sean complained. "I saw your very special way with Heather. Maybe some of that can be taught, but not all of it. What you did was natural talent, plain and simple. You knew just where to touch her and when, just what to say, everything! I'd have to have sex a thousand times before I could even begin to hope to do what seems to come naturally to you."
"You've got a point there. I do seem to have a special affinity for this. In fact, I love fucking so much that I'm beginning to wonder if sex is pretty much going to be my main occupation from now on. I'm happily addicted. But don't count yourself out. You're way ahead of where I was at this point in my sexual development. You may discover talents you didn't even know you had. I did, and completely surprised myself. Maybe instead of having to compare yourself to me you'll end up doing something with Heather that's different but just as good. Who knows. You won't know until you try. If you're really serious about your love for her, you have to take risks. You have to risk the power-mad thing, the rejection, the not measuring up, and much more. But here's the thing. No matter what the final outcome is, I know you're going to live life to the fullest and have a hell of a time on the journey there. So what's it going to be?"
Sean stared off into space for some time, and then looked intently into Alan's eyes. "Okay. I'm in."
"Good. I thought as much. I didn't just pick you at random. I think you have what it takes, and in fact your hesitancy and moral qualms help convince me I picked the right guy. Now, let's get moving. My ass is starting to hurt standing halfway on my bike like this, and I'm already way late getting home."
Sean pushed off and began to bicycle down the street. He still seemed confused and conflicted, and the hurt about what he'd seen and learned about Heather was still visible on his face. "So. You're really gonna set me up with a harem so I can train for Heather, huh?"
Alan bicycled alongside his friend. He grinned. "It's a tough assignment for ya, but someone's got to do it. You should see the surprise I have planned for you tomorrow."
"Unreal. Unreal. Just insanely unreal!" Sean reluctantly grinned too. "But please, no more surprises! That whole closet thing - I'm STILL recovering from the shock!"
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